Well, here’s the thing – I’m thinking maybe the doctor shouldn’t have discharged my husband from the hospital on Christmas Eve. I think he probably did it too early, maybe just so we could have Christmas at home, because he certainly wasn’t better.
In fact, here it is over a month later and he still isn’t better. In the interim since I wrote last, he’s been back to our own doctor and got follow-up x-rays and they still showed pneumonia in his left lung, so she put him on yet another round of antibiotics (his 3rd, 4th if you count the one in the hospital).
So how is he doing now, you ask? Huh. Not so good. Or at least not as good as I would expect. Tomorrow is his last antibiotic and he is still coughing some and is still weak, no energy. He sleeps all day, every day, but he’s still weak and tired all the time.
Of course, I haven’t let him out of the house since the visit to the doctor and we saw the x-rays and her saying he still has the pneumonia. So, as you might expect, he is going absolutely stir crazy and is now suffering from an acute case of cabin fever.
His next follow-up at the doctor is this Wed. (in 2 days), and we were hoping for a clean bill of health, but it’s not looking too good.
I talk to my dad on the phone every day and today he asked me how I am doing, and I said I was doing good, but that’s just talking about my health.
If I were to be absolutely honest about how I’m really doing I’d have to say I’m kinda “over” this thing already! I’m used to Bill and I splitting everything, but with this pneumonia, I’ve had to do everything myself, plus take care of him. I mean, I don’t mind taking care of him, he’s my husband and I love him, and I know he’d do the same for me.
But doing everything around the house, making all the meals, going shopping, taking myself to the library (he always goes with me), going to the drugstore, running errands, etc. is getting kinda old.
Ok, that’s enough. Sorry to complain. I shouldn’t do that. I should be a happy caregiver. But I wasn’t a happy caregiver after the accident that almost took his leg in 2011, either – I just did what I had to do. And that took like a year for him to get truly stabilized on his own. So why should I complain about this? Again, I’m sorry.
The good part is that I’ve been taking care of myself, too, in spite of it all. So my bipolar disorder hasn’t been affected, and that’s really good. I’d hate to be dealing with an episode on top of everything else.
That’s the main thing. If you’re dealing with something that involves someone else, don’t let yourself get overwhelmed, and absolutely, positively, number one rule: Take care of yourself!
Wishing you joy and stability,
Remember God loves you and so do I,