Motherhood is never easy

Last night was very hard, one of our family pets wasn't doing well, my son whom is very close with our pet is in a treatment center to help him cope with his bipolar disorder wan't able to be with his pet in her final hours.

I saw that Nemo the rabbit wasnt doing well she was the runt of the litter and when we adopted her it was bleak, but for two and a half years she brought us much joy. She it made it through that long on her disadvantages, when we adopted Nemo she had challenges of her own which is my my son wanted so badly to have her apart of our lives, because even though she was an animal she too had challenges she faced, she didn't hear all that well, and one of her ears she was deaf in and she had to have special vitamins to keep her heathly for her needs.

Last night was hard for me because I was the care taker of his bunny while he is in treatment to work on his issues, when Nemo wasnt eating her special treats that she liked ( a pink jelly bean) I knew somthing wasn't right, she was walking funny and didn't do her happy jump she usally does when we let her out to run the apartment. Immediatly I took her to the vet ( thank God they take payments) to see what was wrong, the outlook was slim but he said he would do everything possible he could do to save her, I kissed miss bunny on the nose and told her that we loved her and she would be home soon. After an hour and a half of her being at the vets the vet ( who was to leave an hour earlier) called and said she didn't make it. He did everything he could knowing the story of my son and how we aquired such a wonderful pet.

After receiveing the news called my sons unit and explained to his primary what had happend, ( I was crying at the time so bless him for understanding what I was saying, the primary has pets and understood the grieving process) the primary told me to let my son rest for the night and we would tell him in hte morning. I told him I worried about that because he has earned a pass and wanted to see his pets and was worried of how he would take the news. His primary reasured me he would handle the death of his pet like he would his own child and explained how he would proceed and asked me for imput on what I would like to add, I told him that I didn't wnat my son to think of one last time, because when he starts " If I could have only held my bunny one last time I would feel better and that is not true.

Tonight I called my son and told him of the news, he said his primary told him and in group it was hard for him to stay focused, because he said had he had control over his disorder he would have had one last time with Ms Nemo, I told him that Ms Nemo loved him and that is all that mattered and that Miss Kitty is looking forward to seeing him. He cried and then I cried, I wanted so badley to hold my son to let him know that it was okay, but all I could do was reasure him of how much he meant to me and that we will get past this. He agreed he could, and is looking forward to his eight hour pass tomorrow but wanted time in his room. I let him go and then spoke once agaon to his primary in which he reasured me that he would check on my son and talk about the death of his pet, and how no matter what he can move on, life is hard but we have to choose to be surviors in order to help ourselves and others, he explained to my son that Nemo had a better life because she was loved and cared for and that when she needed us most we were there for her and that is what made the difference in her life, had she lived in the wild she would have never known love or how good jelly beans could taste, or how fun it was to play with a ball.

I am looking forward to seeing my son tomorrow and even though this is a rough time for him I want to show him, he can move past this and what ever he needs from me I will help him. I am proud of how he is handeling himself and that he is willing to tallk about his feelings and he isn't taking it out on others or himself, he is allowing to work through the pain in order to move on. We as parents need to teach our children that life isnt easy, but we can make it through, just have faith.

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