Parenting can be tough

I am sure all parents that have special needs children feel fustrated at times. I know I have for the past few weeks. One of the things I am finding is that I work harder for my son then he does and he doesn't relize all things I have done for him. I don't expect him to he is ony a teen, it would be nice for him to appreciate how much I advocate for him and try to educate others with his disorder but maybe someday.

One of the things I am trying to have strength to do is tough love. AT this point in his life, it is time for me to try not overprotect him so much. I know many parents are guily of this, why? because we hate to see our children suffer or be in pain. Especially with bipolar disorder. I have been around bipolar all my life. When my husband was alive, I tried my best to help him, I truely loved him and wanted him to suceed, but he didn't have the strength to lean on me or trust the fact I was truely there to help him, he wasnt very good at making the right choices. So after he committed suicied I vowed I would do everything posible to keep my son safe and would do what I had to. AT the time my son wasn't diagnosed but when he was, I was determined to make sure that he would get the education he deserved and made sure he had the meds therapies and supervision required to keep him safe. After he was diagnoised with bipolar I feared he would end up like his dad, and I truely don't want that to happen, so I have worked helping my son as much as possible making sure he has the tool necessary to suceed and to teach him the correct choices and know that when you make a decision such as taking your life what an impact it has on those you left behind, and how selfish of an act it really is on children. When my son had talked about killing himself, I was scared and afraid of losing him, I made the decision of getting him to the hospital right away, It was very hard to see him as sad as he was and how hopless he felt, but I swore to him I would be there cheering for my baby and I wanted to do what was best for him. Was it heart wrenching, yes, and painful for me, because though they had him on suicide watch I couldn't sleep, once he was out of the woods, I made sure we discussed a safety plan and that I didn't care where I was or what I was doing if he ever feels that way again to call me and I will come over. So far when he is feeling the blues I try to find things to make him laugh. My son is still mad at me for taking him to the hospital, and that has been 6 months ago, but I know I did the right thing.

At school I made sure he had the appropriate acommedations ( which I deserve kudo's for this because it wasn't easy and you have to know the districts laws besides just knowing the I.D.E.A or 504 plans and IEPs and know when to seek help ( some people charge to help you with IEP's, but with enough research and determination you can find those who don't are are very good at showing you the ropes) .

So anyway, my son has done very little to help himself lately which I am not going into detail, but they are things he should do. I know in the past I have done things for him, bailed him out, advocated for hours, and my son is learning nothing by me always doing things for him, so I will have to learn when to help and when not to, he has to learn going to school is important and if he refuses then he will have to suffer the consequences. Anyway have lots to share and will be writing about how to advocate effectively for your child and accomedations. Also will be discussing displining the bipolar child, because sometimes their consequences need to be a little diffent depending on thier cycle and if they are have a trantrum vs manipulation to get what they want.

Everyone take care

www.bipolarcentral.com http://www.bipolarcentral.com/articles/ManipulatingYou.asp