Loosing my cool

Okay, the past two days have been horrible. Like one of those very bad "B" Rated movies, it has it's scarrry moments and a lot of screaming. That is how my last two days have been. My son God love him, is slowly working on my last sane nerve. I knew him becoming a teen was going to be hard now I know why parents get wrinkles and there hair turns gray.

Monday was doctor day, my son was complaining he couldn't breath and he sounded fine to me but considering it was a school day and he has cried wolf so many times I really didn't knwo if he was or not, so I took him to the doctor, 3 hours later and sure enough he has asthma and an infection that the doctor said was minor and would subside in a few days. So with his puffer in hand I took him home and went to work.

Tuesday, the morning was a train wreck. My son was ready to go on th bus when the driver called and said she would be there to pick him up later because she didn't want him to be at school to early, but she told this to my son and not me. ( I was mad) So after she tells my son she will be there later he freaks out and punches the wall and says great now I am going to be late for school ( Mind you he never cared before but Tuesday, it was care about school day) So I just got out the shower and my son say's "Mom take me to school I am not waiting for the bus" I told him was going to take the bus, no discussion, and I am not arguing with him. ( Now I am very mad) So the bus driver calls and tells me she is outside, my son wont leave the apartment to get on the bus and my hair is wet, but thank God I am dress, so I am now yelling at my son ( Think of Fred Flinston yelling for Wilma) and he is still refusing ( NOw I am angry) so the responsible calm adult I am goes out side and walks up to his bus drivers and begin to yell at here telling her, she is apologizing and My reply was " Well is your apology going to get him out the of the because he is refusing to leave. So I walk away and now I am crying swearing at the sky to my sons dead father that this was all his faunt and I am tired of handleing this alone.

I walk into the house sooooooooooooo mad, tears pouring out and I look at my son and say very calmly " If you do not get into the car right now I am going to freak out." So my son replys " and they say I am bipolar. I told him the only thing I want to hear is his feet walking to the car. So I get him to school and go to work. The rest of the evening was pleasant.

Wednesday, my son was tryin to miss his bus but he had one choice, go or be grounded from everything, so he got on the bus, I apologized to the bus driver, and she said to my " I know that it is tough raising a special needs child I understand." So felt better about that. Later on in the day, around 4 when my son is supposed to be in day treatment he isn't. They call me to let me know that my son did show for the bus, and I panik, ( My son doesn't drive nor has a learners permit and he didn't call me which he always does) I started crying and go looking for my son, he isn't at school not answering his cell, I am filled with worry and sadness, so I call my boyfriend and tell him my son is missing and he say's " I am at work" ( Well no shit) So I tell him I am looking for him, I get to my sons school and he is not there and no one has seen him, then I finaly get a hold of my son on his cell to find out he is at a friends house. His lie was that the bus never showed and It did, my son deceided he didn't want to go. I don't even know who these people are never met them, I told my son that I was about to call the police and file a missing persons report or runaway report and he said why? ( I wnted to blow my top what a silly question) So he I went home and met him and his friends I was calm polite and told him that he is to never pull this again, I had to go back to work, When I get home I am hoping he is there.

So I guess today I can't give any advice right now, but I so very need a vacation, but I wanted to let you know that teens can drive you mad and you just have to tough it out and hang in there.
My son doesn't know this yet, but he is very very grounded.