Fitting in

Friday late afternoon I received a call from my sons day treatment life skills teacher. Normally my son doesn't attend on Friday but since he missed 2 days of school this was a consequence for not trying to cope with his mood swings. I asked how he was doing and she said fine, but she had a concern about a story that my son had told her.

Here we go I thought. Whenever he has story time with an authoritive figure, I know it isn't going to be good. So the life skills teachers asks if I knew that my son smokes. I almost fell off my chair, and I said what???????? . The teacher exlpaines to me the situation, my son was on the bus riding with other kids,teens and they were targeting him for having worn the same pair of jeans for 3 days. ( I tell him that he needs to change his cloths and this is another story of fun)
So my son deceids to apprear as Johnny bad ass and blurt, so what if I have these jeans on, does your mom let you smoke ciggarettes.

The teacher was confused as to why he felt that was a defense. I told her that I do not let my son smoke. Hoever when he came home off the bus Thusday night he had a ciggarette, he theatrically threw it on the table and asked me what I was going to do about. Well this was his way of challenging me, and so I smiled told him I loved him and threw it away. My son returned my smile and pulled out another cig and, I said okay MR. Copperfield were did you get a pack of ciggaretts? He laughs and said a friend from the bus. So I told the teacher at this point, maybe I made a bad decision, but if he was bound and determined to smoke and wanted to prove he would regardless of what I let him lite it. However he chocked and coughed and then said screw it. You did that to make fun of me. I told him no that was not the case. So as I explained this to the teacher feeling like a small worm. He reasurred me I did the right thing and that she would be giving a class on tobacco use and peer pressure.

When my son came home I let him know what I was told, and he was soooo mad. My son she wasn't supposed to tell you, I thought I could trust her. I told him he can, she was concerned. So my son asked, Did you get in trouble? (Ah ha his plan all along) I told him no, but did you have extra choirs to do? His face turned mad and said YOU , you were the one, I had to vacuume and take out the trash, and I had to do my homework. I told him that was great he did those choirs and that I want him to do some at home as well. He gave me a dirty look and told me to leave him alone.

A hour later though he came over to me and gave me a hug and told me he loved me and made a poor choice this week. I told him that we all from time to time make poor choices and he wasn' t the only. The main thing is I told him, I wanted him to be honest with me. I also talked to him about not needing to impress others who are not worth his time. Later we deceided that since this week has been stressful for each of us, I suggested watching a movie from his honey dew list (this is a list of positives and what we can do when we need a time out, regroup , we both use this list as this helps my son see that anyone can do these relaxation techniques, not just bipolar)

His movie pick "Lord of the Rings 3." Almost fitting really.